Trending Accountabilty;Are we finally losing it?

   It has been over a week now but I am still hunted by those gruesome pictures of those innocent job seekers murdered (yes murdered;and by you know who) by virtue of their unemployment status…its really sad that
some people take glee in taking advantage of others and that was exactly what happened.
About 19 or so citizens of this great nation lost their precious lives due to the incompetence and negligence of certain persons whom we have entrusted with our freedom and more importantly our future…when one
considers the fact that over 70 000 applicants paid 1000 Naira as application fees for only 3000
vacant seats which when calculated runs close to 7 hundred million naira it becomes rather clear that the pecuniary gains was the master target; all part of a sinister plan to fill their pockets at the expense of others. And all that amounts to scam.
    Nevertheless, I need not press on that matter anymore. Enough articles have been written on how insensitive, greedy and negligent the NIS have been.what bothers me right now is that we as Nigerians
probably because we are now accustomed to bad news (unfortunately) now tend to see evertything as normal. The general aura now is that we have given in to the conditions we find ourselves in and we take whatever is thrown at us. At the risk of sounding downright pessimistic and unpatriotic I dare to say that we have not seen the last of these avoidable mishaps. My question now is this? How do we react. Do we do what we ve seen too often: Condemning the government for a few days and then downing our tools?. Do
we use these ‘trending’ topics as conversation starters just to prove to our friends and colleagues that we don't live under rocks? Or yet do we react with the occasional ‘eyah’, RIP to the dead’, ‘too bad’, ‘the government is wicked’ clichés only to go about our business again like nothing happened? That will not only be hypocritical but cowardly and will amount to a betrayal of the dead!
I have always maintained that the citizens are no better than the leaders-in-title because when all is said and done we still act like them-we only care about ourselves and our relatives or close friends. Everybody is too cautious to be their neighbour’s keeper and it is disheartening to say the least. Now I know the question running through most of your minds…WHAT SHOULD WE DO WHEN THESE SITUATIONS ARISE?
I am not saying we should burn Aso rock,lol no..there are better and legitimate ways to go about it but I am just going to sum it all in one word..ACCOUNTABILTY…if our so leaders are held accountable for
everything that happens in this country, things would be a lot better. A question if I may ask, what is the net worth of your local government chairman, what are your governors' assets(oops I asked two)..well your guess is as good as mine. I don’t know..i honestly do not blame those government officials who loot anything loot-able because they are only yielding to the temptation handling things unsupervised…don't get me wrong.I am not justifying their actions, I am just trying to drive home the fact that progress is a collective
effort. let us make our leaders accountable for everything that relates with their duties to us. It is no more than we deserve. Ultimately it all falls on us,our realization that we owe our fellow citizens a moral duty of
care and our willingness to move forward....remember; history judges us not only by our actions but also by our inactions..

Odigili Uche


Please feel free to disagree as differing opinions will be widely entertained and appreciated

WHOSE INTEREST ARE YOU REPRESENTING?

It is common place in Nigeria for pressure groups like the Civil Rights Association, Society for Women Empowerment and other non-governmental organization to stand in for the interest of the people or a group of persons when the occasion calls. And it is also not rare to find in this same country some bodies who claim federal titles, proclaiming to represent the peoples interest. Hardly will a day pass by without the usual jingles on the radio about the Copy Rights Society of Nigeria (COSON). They claim that no music shall be deployed or played in any public centre, radio or television stations, night clubs, restaurants or bars, hotels et cetera without the appropriate license from them. They also cautioned that to avoid big time legal palaver, the above must be adhered to. But they also failed to qualify the term license and tell Nigerians through media chat or any other orientation channels how they intend the outcome of the granted license to be communicated to the various musicians concerned since they own the musical work. Rather, all they keep telling Nigerians is just the superficial aspect of it, never willing to reveal the undercurrent beneath.
If I am to interpret the word license in its contextual usage, it will mean the authorization granting a person or group of persons the right to deploy or play a particular or different kind of music after such money has been paid. Obviously, if it will not mean monetary attachment, then the jingles will mean that any one upon reasonable grounds can come obtain the permit to play music anywhere. And if this be the case, COSON wouldn’t have issued the jingles initially. If I am to stand on this interpretation, then the ambiguity created by that advert would have been clarified.
The music industry is regarded as a money-spinner in Nigeria. Considering the busy schedules of musicians; some in the studio working out their next smash-hit, others going for concert and other programmes for rendition and other meaningful musical venture that will enhance their profession, how then do they who even care less about whether their music is been played in one hotel, restaurant or bar receive the monetary benefits from COSON as their royalty? How does COSON intend to channel the monies evenly to those Nigerian musicians who are scattered all over and even beyond the country? Or does COSON intend opening a bank account for these musicians were the monies will be paid in their favor? I stand with COSON that permission should be sought before the playing of any music in public places but I split grounds with them on whether the full interest of these musicians will be represented. Will the so called license culminate into interest representation? Or who does COSON think they represent? Article (27)(2) of the United Nations Universal Declaration of Human Rights (1948) etch out that; ‘’everyone has the right to the protection of the moral and material interests resulting from any scientific, literary or artistic production of which he is the author,’’ if the law can make this clear, why can’t COSON; a body claiming to protect the interest of Nigerian musicians and their music, take the pains to enlighten the people (who pay the royalty) on how indeed the collective interest of the Nigerian musicians will be represented.
  The Nigerian Communications Commission (NCC) of recent sued Airtel, Glo and MTN to court because of the poor service delivery to their users. They were claiming about N647.5 million from these network providers just to register their presence that they indeed represent the people’s interest. Whether the N647.5 million if granted them will be shared to the users of the various networks is a million dollar question.It seems as if COSON and the NCC have borrowed wings from our politicians. They are succeeding every day   in getting what they can, canning all they get and eventually sitting on the can. By hook or by crook, they keep parading themselves under the false color of interest representation, but let them not be quick to forget that Nigerians are fun loving people, quick to forget their difficulties and slow to forget that music is what makes them groove afterwards, but forget to remember that there is a restriction attached.

Davidson .I. Obabueki 

THREAT TO SECURITY

Recently, virtually every national daily has as its  headline the unwonted killings of innocent Nigerians. Hardly will a day pass by that I will not hear on the radio station or watch on the television that some people have fallen to the sword of one blood thirsty group. Through acts of bombings, slashing of the throats of innocent souls and sniping, the Boko Haram guerrilla sect seems to be at the moment the greatest threat to Nigeria’s security. From the bombing of the police force headquarters and the United Nations building in Abuja, to the massive gory invasion of churches, mosques and other vulnerable centres, this unholy, blind and vision less alliance has rendered some North-Eastern parts of Nigeria securely insecured.

            The Federal Government last year declared a state of emergency in Yobe, Adamawa and Borno states, and by the ratification of the senate, he has extended it to another six months and yet it seems as if their tide of operation and sophistication is growing everyday in leaps and bounds. Just late last year, this diabolic sect invaded the Federal Government college of Agriculture, Yobe killing many students who were lost in their sleep. Few days before the centenary celebration, they unceremoniously laid siege on the Federal Government College, Yobe killing over 50 pupils. And at about 6:30pm on the 1^st of March, a twin bomb exploded in Borno state killing over 40 persons. And all the presidency keeps saying to Nigerians is ‘we are on top of the situation’, ‘we will bring the perpetrators to book’, ‘we will compensate the bereaved’, ‘we send our heartfelt condolences…’ to mention but a few. When El-shabab attacked the West gate mall in Kenya, the Kenyan president Uhuru Kenyatta ordered that the Kenyan flag be flown at half mast and three days of national mourning be observed. But nothing tangible and visible that portrays the Nigerian spirit except the usual one minute of silence has been seen to be done to those victims of the Boko Haram onslaught.

            The Federal Government has ordered that the chief of Army staff be moved over to Borno State in a bid to curtail the excesses of this sect. He has also ordered that the Northern borders between Nigeria and Cameron, Chad and the Niger republic be blocked. But that has not in the short-run stopped the Boko Haram sect from invading at will. We know that the members of the Boko Haram sect have no true identity and that the security of this country lies on the general responsibility of Nigerians. But one cannot be security conscious only when he or she cannot see visibly the security apparatus put in place by the federal government. When some of the members of the Boko Haram sect where set to assail the Federal Government college in Yobe state on Tuesday, February 25, 2014, it was said that the security sentinels strategically positioned to cordon off the premises, took to their heels because of the calibre of weapons they saw, and now more than 50,000 persons have fled Borno state for their dear lives. So while people are been clutched and clawed to death in the North-eastern parts of Nigeria, others in political positions are left carousing, reveling, promising and laughing out their senses in the Southern and Western parts and other parts not affected of Nigeria. The families of the late legal icon; Chief Gani Fawehinmi and the late afro beat singer; Fela Anikulapo Kuti did not just reject the centenary awards out of sheer jealousy rather the feelings that what they fought for and against still prevails in the country.

              I understand that robots are rarely used in this country. Why can’t that industry be developed and its products used as security network and personnel. The creation of state police has been one of the hue and cry of some people. But the fears that in the time of disputes between the federal and state government, an order made by one and the neglect of it by the other in dire situations may plunge the country into her long list of unresolved problems.

            When the ring leader of Al-Qaeda, Osama Bin Laden bombed the World Trade centre in the US on the 11^th of September, 2001, the American Government wasted no time in bringing justice with action by putting him to the sword. Abubakar Shekarau has been detected to be the ring leader of Boko Haram, instead of the media to keep peddling false information about his death, the armed forces should as a matter of urgently change strategy in bringing justice with action so that when the shepherd is put to the sword, the sheep will be bound to scatter.

                                                                                                GOD DIRECT OUR LEADERS

                                                                                                Davidson .I. Obabueki

MAY I TAKE YOUR ORDER?

       We’ve probably all gone to a restaurant or fast food place and tried to place an order, only to have the waiter(waitress) or attendant give you attitude like you were the reason their boyfriend refused to buy that bag from Balogun or the one who snitched and made the boss scream at them. First of all, you come in, with your civil smile on your face and greet them and they don’t answer, if you’re like me, you just raise your eyebrow and let it go and then you say “ Can I please have fried rice?” and then the waitress squeezes her bleached face, rolls her eyes  and goes “ we only have jollof”. You see, the best advice I can give you in this kind of situation is; unless that’s the only place to buy food in the area, take back your greeting, turn around and leave. No one wants their food served with frustration.

       We all know how nasty customer service can be, especially in Nigeria. Its like everyone is competing for the one who can show the most people that they are frustrated with their jobs and lives. You walk into a shop at 9am in the morning and the shop attendant is snarling at you! Did something chase you in your dream??

       In my opinion, in starting and operating a business, the most important thing after capital is staffing. A businessman could have the most brilliant business idea which under normal circumstances would rake in millions for him but because he has employed staff that have been frowning from their mother’s wombs and snap and snarl at customers, he just might find himself managing a couple of thousands as income. This doesn’t only happen in shops and restaurants though; you also see this kind of animalistic behavior manifesting in some tellers in banks. At times, they are so rude and unaccommodating that you begin to wonder ‘Whose money is it again?’ In a country like Nigeria, where a quantifiable portion of the population is illiterate, I would think people in the position to provide such services would have developed the patience to handle situations where they have to explain little by little. I mean, if you know you have patience span of Christmas banger, find a job where you are not expected to relate with too many people.

        I went to Cold Stone the other day, and their customer service was wonderful. The guy that attended to me was very civil and patient. He came on with the whole ‘Welcome to Cold Stone……’.  Now you would think that they’ve been in business long enough to not have to impress their customers but all the attendants were just as nice. Yes, I was jobless enough to observe.  He was patient enough to give me the lowdown on about three of their specials till I chose the one I wanted and even when I felt like I was overbilled, they took the time to explain why it was that price. Now it’s not because I was a girl and all, I observed and that they were that way with all their customers.

          All those waitresses would sit and complain about how there are seven girls to one guy in the world and how there are no more good guys left, but how do they expect to meet the guys when they scare them off with their frowns and snarls and in direct contrast, the waiters or male attendants are busy hitting on their customers with pickup lines they dug up in the Sahara desert!

        That doesn’t mean that there aren’t crazy customers out there oh. We’ve probably also experienced a few customers going unnecessarily berserk on attendants at airports, banks, shops. They just make a scene and leave, but you see, you can’t fight with a mad person, they would bring you down to their level and beat you with experience. So I would advise you to just steer clear of those ones. If you see someone whose normalcy time bomb is about to go off, just respect yourself and dress back!    

        The moral of my rant today is that you should put a smile on your face; you’d be amazed how much you could change just by smiling. Entrepreneurs; don’t employ frustrated people or people who don’t even believe in the product they are selling, they would kill your product before it gets to your customers. My fellow customers of banks, shops, restaurants, even telecommunication services ( Uche Onise lol) , if you encounter anyone frowning or snarling at you, look straight into their eyes and say ‘ You look ugly when you frown’ and then move on to the next smiling attendant; trust me, it the cheapest way to save our planet. 

  

                                                                                                                      Nky

OF MISSING AIRPLANES: 5 DAYS AND COUNTING

      

How a big airplane can go missing in this world full of satellite and radar technology baffles me beyond comprehension. American Special Forces can shoot a bullet from an underground bunker in the Appalachian Mountains to hit a mosquito half way around the world in Taiwan. But an aircraft this big is giving the security agencies and Armed Forces of ten countries, United States of America inclusive, serious headaches.

The lost aircraft, Malaysian Airlines MH 370 which had 239 souls on board took off from the Malaysian capital, Kuala Lumpur at 12:41 A.M (Malaysian time) on Saturday 8th of March. It was scheduled to arrive in Beijing, China at 6:30 A.M on the same day after a roughly estimated distance of 2,700 miles. But around 1:30 A.M, air traffic controllers in Subang, outside Kuala Lumpur reportedly lost contact with the plane over the sea between Malaysia and Vietnam.

Recovery team experts agree that the pilot did not complain of any distressing event before this rare occurrence. Everything was just going smoothly, and the plane just vamoosed out of contact. All radars and satellite devices orbiting the earth have not been able to help so far in determining the whereabouts of the plane.

Although I admit that I read too much spy novels and have an irresistible sympathy for Hollywood films, but I am pretty sure that one of those many satellites that Western powers having been racing to put in the sky is capable of zooming through the clouds to read the headlines of a Newspaper on a stand in a subway station (ask John Grisham about this). So why is this big aeroplane that is carrying 239 people not showing up on any technological device?

Rescue operatives are theorizing the causative factor of this mishap. They have drawn up three different theories as to the fate of the plane. Nothing concrete, but mere speculations. The first is that the plane ran into mechanical problems. I would not even attempt to adumbrate the variegated possibilities which could have led to this catastrophic disappearance. Military and technical experts have agreed that there is no concrete evidence, not even the slightest shard of speculative evidence which could point to a mechanical fault in the plane which could have resulted in this. The second speculative theory which is under serious doubt is that the pilots encountered human error. The possibility of this happening is very slim, as experts believe any such remote occurrence would have left traces to be picked up by the Control Tower.

The third theory which is the one that everyone is afraid of, yet the cleanliness of the disappearance, the way no trace was left behind leads to it: terrorism. Of course, memories of September 11 abounds in our minds, and authorities are careful to consider all available evidence, and have come to the conclusion that there is nothing concrete which points to terrorism. However, rescue teams and technical analysts have still not cast aside this theory, for nobody is certain of anything as at now.Examination of relevant documents and tapes have revealed that nothing was remotely wrong with the aircraft just before take-off. All pre-flight and flight protocols are alleged to have been followed. The only suspicious incident is that two of the passengers are alleged to have used false passports in boarding the planes, and have been confirmed to be Iranian Nationals. I need not remind you that Iran is a country known for destructive violence and acts of terrorism against Western Nations.

Families of the passengers of the allegedly ill-fated flight have reported that the telephones of their relatives in the plane were still ringing, as at Monday, 10th of March. Of course, the phones kept ringing out with no one to answer.
  Experts are using this report to aid their theory that the plane cannot be under water. Thus, helping to narrow the search area by ruling out the possibility that the plane crashed at sea. However, as earlier stated, everything is mere speculations and the authorities are not prepared to quit searching the seas until they have something more definitive.

There is a rumoured speculation that the plane was hijacked, and the passengers and crew are being held against their will. But procedure requires that the pilot send a May-day warning to the control Tower in event of such occurrence. The abruptness of the disappearance and lack of warning puts this speculation in serious doubt. And in the absence of any person or group claiming responsibility, terrorism seems to be far from the answer.
Rescue operatives are in the process of triangulating the position of the cell phones of the passengers, using GPS data. However, this attempt seems to be hitting the rocks as the phone batteries are running out.

Does this then mean that we have another Bermuda Triangle in the offing? Or is this simply an act of God beyond human comprehension?

I pray God gives strength to the families and friends of the victims to bear through these hard times.

IT BEGINS WITH YOU!

       Walking into a plush restaurant in Magodo after my car broke down, I noticed two women at the extreme talking and giggling. Itching to hear what all  the ruckus was about, I sat at a table  close to them. Sipping my wine, I repositioned my head to get a better view of their faces while I listened, I listened not eavesdropped.

“You won’t believe this, he wears only one shirt to class” said the girl closer to me.

“Oh! My! Gosh!! Girl… you are so dope, how did you manage to sit near him” the other replied while dutifully twiddling her hands.

“I nearly gagged…”

     I could not believe my ears on what these caricatures of the very existence of humans were blabbing about.  The first question that popped into my head while been oblivious of the voices behind me was “WHO ARE WE TO CONDEMN OTHERS?” It reminded me of conversation with a cousin of mine about stance on Nigeria politics.  “Jide, you have the auspicious aura of being a great politician emitting from your very being: I said teasingly.  “God  forbid, that is the last thing I would want to be” he said looking at me squarely in the face. “Why? I asked in a bemused tone.  “Everything about Nigerian politics is a farce, corruption  and theft rule the realm… on and on he went while I listened with rapt attention.

    The salient question before us still remains” WHO ARE WE TO CONDEMN OTHERS”. Judge yourself before you judge others. Are you better than the boy who wears one shirt to class everyday down or the girl who works at the strip club.  Life has a way of making the hunter the hunted within a twinkle of an eye.  It is still a befuddling concept that people can cast aspersions on the honesty of the government when they themselves are no better than thieves.  It is also a striking surprise that we can accuse the government of killing persons for rituals when we all can kill a person with out mouth and commit abortion.  Hmmm!!! I'm not trying to exonerate anybody from their faults or abate them of them either, all I am saying is that a change begins with you, why don’t you give the boy with only one shirt some and go down to the girl at the strip club and show her some love. Why don’t we help the girl who got pregnant while in school with her academics instead of casting aspersions on her virtues, it could be you or me, nobody knows tomorrow.  It begins with you trying to stop stealing your parents’ money in ways a person can’t imagine, giving a little help to those around us in need of it, the change actually begins with you.  A popular adage says, “he who points a finger at others should also remember that three more fingers point back at him”.

    If we care so much to notice the negative sides of others, we could be ardent enough to cause a change instead of pouring our vile, demeaning and absurd sentences on others.

    A change in the world begins with our attitudes in our homes, amongst our friends and in the community at large.

Written by: Khosy E.

On this International Women's Day......

          Flipping through the Newspaper on a Sunny day, a particular topic caught my attention. My God, what I saw brought tears to my eyes and a fierce hunger in me to revolt; women have been degraded to a level of nothingness.

 

         We have often been told that “equality for women has been won” but hey!! Cut the crap, that’s a big lie from the very pit of hell! What happens to women being killed by their partners, girls been victimized and raped? I read of stories which included the rape of a ten month old baby Hadiza, six year old daughter of a gateman, 19 year old Godiya who was raped by a Pastor, a six month old who was raped to death, are these facts part of the concept of equality between men and women? I also begin to wonder what pleasure a sensible man hopes to get from sex with a toddler except a mad man, yes, a mentally deranged and depraved personality.

       Another aspect that left me burning of this marginalized group is the pornography industry. The pornography industry has been taken to another level, degrading and demeaning the existence of the female folks. The display of women in a disgusting state for the pleasure of viewers including gross brutality and violence brings tears that burn so hot. I believe that behind the smiles, we do not know their pains, we do not know or have a clue as to what happens behind the scenes and the façade behind the videos. Women have also been turned into baby making machines. Most men marry for the sole purpose of procreation forgetting God’s main aim for creating a woman which is to be a companion. I recently watched a film where a husband found out that his wife was on the pill, he beat her up and while she was still recovering from the shock of it, he forcefully slept with her to make sure she got pregnant. Such brutality in this 21^st century? It just gives me the shivers. That is not even the worst of it, a girl is raped and brutalized but creations of God go ahead to post such a video online; what human does that to his fellow human. It reminds me of several videos which included the video of 3 women tortured and manhandled for stealing N50 Pepper; ordinary pepper! Sticks were inserted into their private parts as part of the torture process, such atrocity. Another girl was stripped naked and assaulted by the so-called thief catchers after she was caught with a stolen Blackberry. We sure know of the story of the girl who went to visit a friend she met on 2go and was gang raped with the full episode posted on the internet. Sit back, relax and ponder on the fate of these unfortunate girls.

         I believe section on 34(1) of the Constitution of the Federal Republic of Nigeria 1999 as amended refers to the fact that a person is not to be subjected to torture, inhuman or degrading treatment but I also do not want to believe that it excludes the women from it’s protection. Now, people would say that rape occurs due to the provocative dresses that girls wear; Wow!!! That’s very impressive but does this theory also apply to the rape of toddlers by uncles, dads, brothers, cousins etc? Does it apply to the case of a girl who refused sexual advances from an admirer?  Does it apply to a girl coming back or going to vigil whose only crime was walking at night?

         The facts that cut through my heart are that some vile demons in form of women also help to perpetrate these evil deeds. It is an intractable question I find myself asking, women are supposed to fight, stand up and defend one another instead of engineering the whole deed and reducing their fellow woman to a sized pea. A widow is chased out of the house, common sense demands that the elderly mothers of the boy’s family should understand the plight of the widow instead they are the beginning and ending of the abuse in collaboration with the males in family, such wonder.

      It is time for liberation of women, for the whole world to move at a desired pace, the downtrodden group must be liberated. Women have a tremendous role to play not only in the liberation but in making sure that it is an all the way revolution. We are not baby factories, sex toys and worst of all punching bags, we are humans with feelings and capable of full equality in every realm.

       This is a clarion call to all the women and girls out there, we are specially created by God and should also partake in the fulfillment entitled to us. My ears tingle when I hear some chauvinistic males saying that girls can’t pass a particular limit. We can do it, we can be the best, we can excel in what we do and do it better that them, if we only can believe that being a girl doesn’t stop us from actualizing our full potentials.

        I leave with this final note, a woman was created from the ribs under his arms to be protected, close to his heart to be loved and not under his feet to be trampled upon. A man who shows any form of brutality doesn’t exhibit manly strength but is been deluded to show forth his weakness and insecurity.

 

Written by:
Khosy .E.

 

 

ALLOCUTUS TO NNPC

O thou mighty NNPC!
The Alpha and the Omega of power in Nigeria
The sole source fundamental of fuel in Nigeria
The Almighty dictator of whether Nigerians should have fuel or not.

We have sinned against thee
We have committed a transgression so great to provoke thy mighty wrath
Our ignorance in following the ignorant was our ruinous undoing
For this, we say we are sorry.

We accept that we were trying your patience when we listened to that whistle blower
We accept that we insulted your sense of honour when we whispered on blog pages and newspaper
We accept that the House of Reps were drunk when they asked you to account for your past income
For tis only the drunken that can speak with such thriving ignorance.

We have seen the might of your power and the extent of your influence
We have learnt that we do not argue with he who supplies food on our tables
We are learning to turn a blind eye to your nefarious activities
For thou art mighty, and thy actions unquestionable.

We have learnt that blood is thicker than water; given PHCN’s recent attitude towards electricity
Sold like a slave to the highest bidder; after two decades of being abused and insulted
They are sympathising with you no doubt.
And we are left to bear the brunt of your collective anger.

Forgive us our transgressions, and accept our olive branch
We offer you our silence, we offer our reticence
We shall go blind because of thee, and ears deaf to thy activities
As long as our daily quart of oil is to us supplied.

Give us fuel, o Mighty NNPC
And beseech thy brother PHCN to bestow us with the grace of electricity
We pay our homage to you both, and promise to never question your activities
Your point has been made, and we are truly sorry.
  

TELEMUNDO : A WOMAN'S CHAMPION'S LEAGUE

           For decades, maybe even centuries, men during football season have dominated the television and neglected their wives and girlfriends’ pleas for attention and conversation in order to prevent them from missing Messi’s free kick, women everywhere have given up and accepted defeat at the hands of Super Sport……or so we thought.

        Now while the men and boyfriends of the world were busy jumping and squealing while watching Manchester United and Arsenal school each other, the Global Association of Wives and Girlfriends was scheming and brainstorming ways to regain control of the television at all hours, the African branch argued that they were already in charge of concoction of meals and nominated the American branch for the task, the American women argued vehemently that they were already in charge of the production and distribution of weaves and shoes and so they could not take on another project. After much argument and delegation of responsibility, it was finally agreed that the Mexican branch who had remained jobless from the inception of the organization should take on the responsibility of coming up with a way for the women to repay their men for their ninety minutes of negligence and regain control of the remote at the same time.

     The Mexican women tried various things ranging from ensuring that the times for beauty pageant clashed with the times of various matches to ensuring that matches were played on weekdays so working men would be discouraged from watching but nothing seemed to work. Just when the Mexican women were about to call an emergency meeting and declare that they had given up, they decided that they might not be able to stop football but they could come up with feminine equivalent to the evil that stole their men’s attention for all of 90 minutes! Thus Telemundo was born.

      Now, for those of us who are not familiar with this concept, let me give you a short lesson on the subject. Telemundo is a DSTV channel on 118 which only shows Mexican or South-American soaps with English voice-overs, mainly on subjects of love, jealousy, envy and passion. The actors and actresses are characteristically beautiful. Telemundo is relatively a new channel and started off on AIT and other TV stations which showed Mexican soaps for one hour every day. There are some popular ones which you may heard of or even watched such as ‘When you are mine’ , ‘Second Chance’ etc And for men, if you have been wandering what keeps your wife or girlfriend awake till eleven watching TV every weekday, it’s probably a Mexican soap. It’s worthy to note that since these Mexican soaps are shown for only one hour every day, they span over four months before they are concluded.

          Now back to the women’s scheme, The plan of the Mexican women became such a great success that it was given its own channel which shows at least five consecutive telenovelas each showing for fifty minutes daily (without adverts). The GAWG was so happy at the invention of the Mexican branch and put it to use immediately. Instantly, they stopped complaining of the men’s football and tables turned. The men were the ones complaining that women no longer had their time because they were busy watching Telemundo and admiring the beautiful actors carefully handpicked for such a purpose.

    Telemundo has now come to ensure that women no longer have the time to try to distract their husbands and boyfriends from football. This story just goes to show you the power of a determined woman or in this case, all the determined women in the world. We are watching to see what the International Association of Husbands and Boyfriends will do about this, until then please who knows what’s wrong with Pilar? lol

THE QUINTESSENCE OF BEAUTY

My very good friend, Walter Ude tweeted this story to me, and I couldn't resist sharing it.  Walter blogs at My Mind Snaps.

THE QUINTESSENCE OF BEAUTY

We have been coached to abstract the idea of beauty as being perfect; Perfect physique, perfect eyes, perfect nose, perfect lips,
and perfect hair – in other words, too perfect to be human. It seems to me that once you have moved up your way to the top of the entertainment industry and have being elevated from being a mere human to a super-perfect star, then – and only then – can you be called “beautiful”.
The question of who decides who is beautiful is one that has always puzzled me. So I did a bit of investigating on my own. I asked around for my usual company to define beauty. I got
answers like “J-Lo”, “Brad Pitt”, “Halle Berry”, and “Beyoncé”. In some instances, some even tossed out “Genevieve Nnaji” and “RMD”. I rest my case. Does having a well-toned figure/physique, piercing brown eyes and high cheekbones make you beautiful? And if so, does that mean that I – with my ordinary looks – have lost out on this prestigious title?
The pressure to be perfect, created by media hype, has gotten numerous youths, especially the girls, into a frenzy – so much so that teenagers believe that worthiness is not their birthright. There’s the dieting, the fashion consciousness – which is just a pseudonym for tighter tops and shorter skirts –, and the heart attack they almost get when a parent suggests a hair-cut. How on earth are they supposed to get Beyoncé’s flowing hair if they are visiting the barber every now and then? And I’m no even talking about the youngsters above their twenties. In the cosmetic surgery-jammed cities of Los Angeles and New York, you get 16-
year-olds talking about getting nose jobs and tummy tucks.
Whatever happened to “what counts on the inside matters” and “being pure of heart”? Growing up, I had a cousin who was blessed with a tendency to be chubby and thick, short, unforgiving, stubborn hair (cursed with it more like, she always emphasized). But her mother always assured her that she was the most beautiful girl ever. But uh-uh… she knew better. When she got into secondary school, not even motherly love could pacify her insecurities that just got worse. She thought that if she could put on a little mascara, walk like Naomi Campbell, and fit herself into a dress that Mariah Carey would wear, she too could be called “beautiful”. She quickly
learned that trying to meet everyone’s passive expectations was humanly impossible.
I’m not trying to disparage those fortunate ones who’ve been blessed with successes in the gene pool contest. In fact, I’m human enough to turn for a second look each time a girl with a stunning face and an arresting derrière walks by; or to sigh with envy whenever I see a guy with abs worthy of the Mr. World beauty pageant.
I’m also trying to encourage those of us with beauty imperfections. I’m saying that when someone asks you who you consider to be the most beautiful person in the world, you should
majestically raise your chin, brush your shoulders off and reply, “Me!” Why? Because at the core of it all, you are perfect, whole
and complete. God is your artist. He created you. You are His definitive work that can never be surpassed.
              

                           ******

Of course, the author of this article, Walter Ude is a very handsome dude, I can vouch for that, having seen him though not in person, but following him on all the Social Networking sites gives me the advantage of seeing his unadulterated and un-mutilated pictures.

So 'bad-belles' should not view this article as an 'avenue' to give hope  to the 'worwor' citizens of Cyberspace.

Beauty, lies not only in the eyes of the beholder, but also the mind of the object.

Special thanks to @Walt_shakes for this article.

You can read the article from the original source here.