Friday, 27 September 2013

DRESSED TO KILL

DRESSED TO KILL
She entered the cathedral dressed to kill, or so she thought. To her, all
the guys were in danger. She was set to slaughter them, but it eluded
her that she was in fact dressed up in WAR.
She had taken an age to journey into the deepest of her wardrobe to
unearth all shades of colored clothes;and as she came out,a
rainbow hung above just like in those epic battles.
On her,the colours stop to riot,they gave WAR duel. They slashed at
one another,killing their mates just for personal prominence and the
result was a thick sweat that lined her brow.
Her face,brow and lips were blotted with colors, like a toddler tried
his hands on painting. She looked like a polished Arondizuogu
masquerade.
Those were not all.
She stood on a 12 inches mountain of doom, hoisted up to look like
a modern day daughter of Anak, deluding herself into thinking she
wore shoes. Her ankle ached. The attention getting koi-koi sounded
like the Ogbunigwe from the deepest of the Udi hills during the
Biafran War.
A cursory look at her head would send a little child scampering. On
it sat a medieval fortress which depressed on her so much so that
she had to suave her head right and left, just to relieve the weight. A
wig does not kill, she thought.
Her ears accentuated her armour. On them dangled her shield of
sheer metal. One could see her ear lobes stretched beyond
elasticity. They shrieked for help. She shushed them,while her golden
sword pierced her nose in crude fashion, but she flinched not.
Her neck was strapped with the necklace of valor, choking her breath
away. She struggled, swallowed and beamed a plastic smile.
She couldn`t complain, a general doesn`t. She was the ideal fashion
general, dressed to kill, but one wonders who would truly be dead
before nightfall.

Written by Ogbu Godwin.

This write-up is the imaginative creation of the writer.

Special thanks to Godwin Ogbu for his contribution.  Contributions should be sent as Microsoft Word attachment to oluwanonso.equation@gmail.com


Wednesday, 25 September 2013

MUCH I CARE ABOUT SOMETHING

It is the oldest known logic in human history-Cause and effect. Action and reaction. True to type, Reuben Abati was on hand to rescue his Boss. It wouldnt be surprising should Mr. Abati tell us the President travelled alone to America, his words no longer hold meaning to me. The man now wears a thin veneer of responsibility to me. He could turn white to black in the twinkle of an eye.           
A senior official in the Bangladesh foreign ministry had this to say about the 165-man delegation his prime minister took to the 68th UN General Assembly: "There is no justification of such a huge delegation spending huge hard-earned money of poor people by way of comfortable air travels and staying in luxurious hotels because only a few officials from the Prime Minister's office...have the engagement with the UN". This is indeed a great lesson to be learnt at no cost whatsoever, but our own President would rather ignore the statistics available to him.Certainly, I couldnt help but feel sorry for the Bangladeshi official, but he needed to have come from my country to know what it feels like "spending huge hard-earned money of poor people". He is even crying over a paltry 165-man entourage, whereas my own President felt the whole Government should be at the UN. The twinges of disquiet didnt readily creep in until much later because from the look of things, we are obviously on the path to doom. Which sane country would not try to salvage its dwindling educational environment, how little however? Except my President is trying to tell me his entourage-equalling a small village, is entirely made up of uneducated men and women, himself inclusive.           
And so when I saw the amiable D.G of Securities and Exchange Commission(SEC), Arunma Otteh, smiling and nodding like an Agama lizard besides the President, while the latter was being interviewed, I didnt need the explanations of the self-acclaimed image maker, Mr.Abati. The action said much, not the least of which was: "Nigeria is the safest heaven on earth. Nigerian Universities are the best universities in the world. Nigerian Youths are more technologically advanced than their western counterparts. There are quadrillion jobs waiting for the over 500,000 graduates. Nigeria is indeed over-flowing with milk and honey."

Written by Arikor Collins.

Tuesday, 24 September 2013

TIME TO LASSO A WILD HORSE.

Before embarking on this task, I had dedicated a great deal of attention to ongoing happenings which might have rendered my efforts worthless, but everywhere around me was over-filled with encouraging signs.   
Nigeria, as most often is the case seems to be a land of absurdities. From Spartan State legislators to lascivious National legislators-whose licentious libidos could not be curtailed. From a National budget not passed six months into the fiscal year-because some selfish interests have not been met to the Government spending millions daily on refreshments. The political landscape is awash with them and the country seems to be thriving in them (absurdities, I mean). Little wonder then a writer gave it a befitting sobriquet, ‘A land of unusual precedents’. One absurdity has been gradually rearing its ugly head and sending out grisly warnings which have constantly been ignored. After the not-so-long political conundrum in Rivers State, the President’s wife took to different media to register her disapproval. But while condemning the upheaval, made such remarks as "This office", "it is our position" etc. It struck with awe how far our President's wife had gone in her ravenous bid for power, same with a random wife whose husband had managed to get himself into a little political position. A close look at the ongoing constitutional amendments never at any point provided for the "First-Lady syndrome" which is spreading like    harmattan wildfire amongst wives of political office holders. But, the stark nature of the situation had hit me with a thrusting force-This is Naija-a land where everything goes.
It seems that Madame is garnering enough clout for her Darling husband's second term bid, and in the process doesn't mind whose toes are stepped on (even the constitutions'). She seems to be at the limelight of her husband's administration, taking delight in making grandiose trips abroad at the slightest instance, that one couldn't help but wonder if she wasn't the one we voted for in the first instance.
Ironically, the greater part of the blame should be apportioned to us. We had watched in our usual nonchalant attitude the progression from a tenuous trait to a repugnant character. From Maryam Babangidas' glamour and lavishness in a country bedevilled by mortuaries for hospitals, death-traps for roads and stones for bread, to Maryam Abachas' display of grandeur and opulence with taxpayers hard-earned monies. Then followed Stella Obasanjos' acts of personal aggrandizements.
My only fear and rightfully as such remains: is that should the status quo not be checked, the next President's wife might be a combination of all these traits mentioned herein, and only then, in our usual manner of crying over spilt milk, would we realize that the situation has crossed over from a handshake to a chest shake.



This article was written by Arikor Collins.

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Monday, 23 September 2013

It Begins With Me


I have learnt to accept whatever life throws at me. I have also learnt to accept the fact that as a Nigerian, there are many things which I just have to put up with. If I keep waiting for the Government to do things for me, I might end up like the 52 year-old lady who is still waiting for Mr Perfect to propose to her. Life has its ups and down, and life as a Nigerian definitely has more ups than downs. But it is left to me to choose whether to pick up the pieces from the ‘downs’ and create opportunities which will catapult me to the desired height, or to keep waiting in the abysmal pit for my saviour to come and rescue me.
People do say that life is not a bed of roses, but we cannot ignore the fact that life does indeed have all the necessary raw materials to make a lovely bed of roses. It is left to me to decide whether I will be the one to pick up the spade or I should simply wait for someone who is ‘better qualified’ than me to do the task. We are now in a generation where ‘anything’ can happen; and one has to constantly be on the lookout for such miracles.
Everyone wants to make it in life, but sadly, not many people are ready to take that leap of faith that will set them on the track to greatness. But the truth about life is that until we take that leap of faith, we are just going to continue waiting in vain like the 52 year-old lady who is still patiently waiting for her perfect man.
Many people are familiar with the story of the stowaway Nigerian boy who took that great leap of faith that has tremendously catapulted him into achieving his goals. This boy’s dream was to go to America, but he did not just sit back at home, content with watching Hollywood movies. No Sir. He took a great and dangerous leap by going the extra mile to see that he actualises his dream. And his sacrifice was ultimately rewarded with success.
Although I would really love to see someone else try it, but this article is definitely not encouraging anyone to try such dare-devilry tricks such as hanging on to the tyres of an aeroplane. The crux of the matter is that watching Hollywood movies alone and fantasizing yourself in America won’t take you anywhere near America. It is until you take that great leap, such as hiking that plane, or hanging on to that tyre, or even jumping out of that building that you will be many steps closer to the great America. Let me be as quick to remind you that there are many hospitals in America which specialise in treating broken bones limbs, as well as a number of well-funded psychiatric hospitals with sophisticated gadgets in America, should your plan go wrong.
Actually, we do not need to employ such extreme tactics before we get that close to our dreams. All that may be required may just be to purchase that change of course form, or to fill that JAMB form, or even to register for that examination. It might just be a simple visit to his office, or even to just speak out.
Just as that Nigerian teenager who ‘discovered’ himself amidst the tyre well of Arik Airplane, I have discovered my own selling point, and I am going to use that opportunity to build a bed of roses for myself. If we are all to do the same, then this world is definitely going to become one big merry Rose garden. 

Posted by Oluwanonso.
Follow me on Twitter @oluwanonso_Esq

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THERE IS A TIME FOR EVERYTHING

I remember as a child when I would just lie down gazing at the stars to philosophize. I used to ask God some deep questions pertaining to my existence. One such questions that I remember asking is why I am a Nigerian. Why was I not born to an American household or European   parents? Or even if I were to be born into a Nigerian household, why did I not end up as the son of stinkingly rich business tycoons like Aliko Dangote or Femi Otedola. It was after watching the match that Chelsea played against Fulham on Saturday that it occurred to me that there are really some things that are beyond our control.
No matter how much we try to be in control of our lives, there are still some things that are things that we just cannot determine because they are completely out of our control.
John Mikel Obi scored his first goal ever in English premiership on Saturday after playing for over seven years. One cannot deny the fact that he is indeed an integral part of the Chelsea squad. But can it be that all these while that he has been playing, he did not strive hard enough to get a goal? During Michael Essien’s stay at Stamford Bridge, we definitely saw him score goals. And Essien and Mikel Obi were both defensive midfielders.
Thus, can we then attribute our centenary troubles in our dearly beloved Nigeria to lack of trying? There have indeed been many people who have tried to get Nigeria into the biblical Promised Land that our Colonial masters promised us when they first made contact with us. But it seems that no matter how hard these celebrated patriots try, there are always some insurgents who will want to place their own selfish agendas over and above the well-being of the general public. And sadly enough, these selfish insurgents are occupying positions of authority which places them at the helm of our affairs.
But as the Holy Bible records, there is a time for everything under the heavens. If it could take Mikel Obi seven years of hard work before he could get his first Premier League goal, then the do-gooders in this country who are sweating daily to shape this country into that desired Utopia should not be discouraged by the efforts of selfish insurgents- in whatever form they appear. Whether it is that politician that has been siphoning hordes of Nigerian Naira meant to build infrastructure, or the boss who has been wrongfully denying you the promotion which you so rightfully desire, or that lecturer who has been thwarting your every attempt to graduate successfully, we should not be discouraged. Rather, we should view these obstacles in the way an advancing striker views defenders who are trying to stop him from getting his desired goal by dribbling around the obstacle while also trying to avoid getting injured.

Even if it takes us 55 years, the time for this country to blossom is coming. And on that great day, no defender would be spared that dribble which will disgrace them for ever. No matter the number of lawyers that the corrupt politician lines up, or the amount of bribes that has changed hands, nothing will stop this country from getting there.
And on that day, I will be there to see it all. 

This article was posted by Oluwanonso.

Wednesday, 14 August 2013

JONATHAN WORE NO SHOES TO SCHOOL, NOW NIGERIAN YOUTHS WEAR SHOES TO NO SCHOOL.

Think not of what your country can do for you, but of what you can do for your country.... J.F KENEDY
It seems that this dictum of Kenedy's is fast becoming an unachievable height of Utopia. The only thing Nigerians can do is to expect their government to do things for them. How does this Jonathan administration expect the youths of this generation to contribute to the developmental well-being of this country when the basic and fundamental ammenities to do so are conspisciously lacking in this country.

I wonder how the youths of this country can build good roads and bridges, develop space ships, man the up-to-date gadgets that are being imported into the health sector, and manage our bubbling economy without the prerequisite exquiste knowledge to do so?
Permit me to say, but it seems that everything that concerns this country is an abberation, a deviation from the normal. Why else should our dear Jonathan, who wore no shoes to school (at least he had a school to go to) not allow our youhs who definitely have shoes to wear, the chance of going to school?
For 41 days, the university students of this capricious country have been biting their fingernails at home, doing totally nothing. Yet the leadership of this country have been going about in their normal business, because their own kids are safely tucked away in foreign universities. They have continued to earn their salaries and their allowances out of the taxmoney which my own parents paid. My parents paid their taxes dutifully, in the hopes that the helmsmen of this country will manage it to the betterment of the nation. But alas, the helmsmen have made it a fundamental duty to thwart the hopes and aspirations of her citizens.
Mr President Sir, I cannot bring myself to understand why the wondergirl whom you so much boasted about, and who worked at the World Bank, should tell us that this government has no money to meet ASUU's demands. If the Finance Minister actually possesses all the qualification that she claims to have, why then can she not dream of ingenious means to raise money to pay the lecturers? Such as cutting down on the expenses and allowances of top governmental workers for instance?
The Legal Watchmen would like to remind Jonathan that it is barely past a year that he made the unpopular decision to cut fuel subsidy. One cannot afford to make such mistakes all the time, especially not when he is considering running for a second term.

There is money in Nigeria, no doubt, and there is money in the pockets of the Federal Government. So the F.G should stop being stingy and accede to the demands of our lecturers, so that we the youths can be able to do good things for this country, and not expect the country to do things for us.

Jonathan, please we have shoes, and we want to wear them to school.

Thursday, 8 August 2013

Spirit Of Sallah.

Let us not to the marriage of true Minds admit impediments:
Now that the spirit of Sallah is upon us once more, and especially when are brillant cabinet members have decided that nothing, not even the FEC meeting will make them miss the Sallah celebrations, the Nigerian massess must not be left out. We must join in killing rams in an Islamic manner to celebrate our centenary woes. While we are doing it the Muslim way, we must not put our national problems out of mind. The fact that our university students have been at home for over a month should be fresh in our minds as we celebrate the Sallah way. we should also not forget the National Assembly is in the process of amending some perinent sections of our opprobriously "reverred" constitution. While slaughtering the rams, we should bear in mind that very soon, suitors would be coming to ask for the hand of our eight-year old daughters in marriage, because our Nigerian law has said that it is the "Islamic way".
I do not want to be a spoilsport, but I just want us to remember to be grateful for the season, and the very fact that we have rams to slaughter. But while we are slaughtering these rams, let us do it in symbolism of slaughtering our problems because ALLAH IS GREAT, and I do not want to believe that the Great ALLAH will stand back and watch His people suffer.


OLUWANONSO.

Monday, 22 July 2013

CHILD NOT BRIDE

      I’m sure I speak for a lot of Nigerians when I say I really don’t know where we are going in this country and by now you should know that this is about the marriage age that the Senate recently approved
   Nigeria as it is has just about enough issues to deal with without bringing up paedophilia. We have been independent for more than 50 years and are pumping millions into celebrating a centenary anniversary in a few months and we do not have stable electricity, education is hanging by the thread of a thread, employment is terrible, security-no! Infrastructural development-No! Health-no! but those we have voted to use their heads and lead us have decided to use this privilege to feed their ungodly thirst by approving the amendment of a law to make brides out of our little girls
   And of course, they have a reason. Why not use Islam to back it up. This is Nigeria and here there are many religions practiced with each having the right to do so without imposing its doctrines on the believers of others religions. Therefore, it is improper and unconstitutional for this to be imposed on the over 140 million people in this nation. Even Islam is not a good enough excuse for this. Aren’t there Muslim women anymore? Have they suddenly become extinct or completely undesirable?   Or is there a new desire for the youth and the dreams and the futures of little girls that we do not know about. The Senators backing this obviously have a type and I daresay they should be ashamed to have taken part in the destruction of such young and promising lives. They are never there when the repercussions set in. They dump these girls and move on to younger, fresher prey leaving the young child battling for her life with little odds. 
   Don’t we have enough issues on child rape to fill our desks and minds and now we want to say to paedophiles that its ok to rape children as long as they plan to marry them afterwards. Everyday there is a heart wrenching story about how a young child was raped by a beast on two legs  and yet absolutely nothing is done about this, yet we want to enhance this by putting a signature  to child marriage. It is petrifying to think what Nigeria will become of this is allowed to go through.
The assent of this law will destroy all the work put in by numerous NGOs to prevent child marriages in the north. We were fighting VVF in the North and now we want to legalise the very thing we fought against. If young girls have to run from the tents of religion; will they also be forced to run from the law. If the law cannot protect Nigerians then we are indeed going nowhere. How can we have fought so hard to gain our freedom on to prevent our children from enjoying the same! Where are all those who shoud lend their voices to this? Mothers, Fathers, Activists, Lawyers, Doctors, President! This is not something that affects just one faction of the nation; if this is to become law then all our daughters, sisters, nieces, granddaughters, cousins will beprey to such. We should not be deceived into thinking that only Northerner would be subject. Things like this go around. We cannot let our kids be defiled while we sit and stare.
   Now more than ever, we need to rally round and raise our voices. We need to speak as loud as we can and ensure that we are heard. We cannot sit back and let everything be taken from us. Women cannot suffer in labour only for some rich and twisted man to come and take away our daughters to warm their beds. Let thus also be a lesson to us that the next time we vote for our leaders to take it as a task to ensure that they wouldn’t make laws to strike us where we stand. There is no one to wait for to speak for us. Our only saviour is our ability to use our voices to resist. I choose to use mine. I choose to fight this evil that these priority-devoid Senators have set in motion! I am Nigeria and I am against Child marriage! 
                                                        

                                                        ERIN SILVER

       

Thursday, 4 July 2013

BAN ON THE USE OF MOTORCYCLE IN EDO STATE: A RASH DECISION?

BAN ON THE USE OF MOTORCYCLE IN EDO STATE: A RASH DECISION?
            “To be a poor man is hard, but to be a poor man in the land of dollars is the very bottom of hardships” W.E.B. Dubois. Sadly, the harsh economic conditions which forced Dubois to utter such lamentations at a time when being black in America was a crime has gradually  began to outplay itself in the 21st century Nigeria! This time, it is a crime to be poor in Nigeria.
                The recent ban on commercial and private motorcycle operators in some parts of Edo states on the 17th June 2013 by the Comrade Governor; Adams Aliyu Oshiomhole, could best be described as an act of misguided zeal. No need reminding us that motorcycles (okadas) have served as a useful means of transportation within the unassailable valleys called roads in the country in arriving at our destination. On what basis was the ban issued? According to the government, the recent spate of crimes and accidents in the state is attributable to the okada riders and as such the imposition of the ban would help reduce the tidal crime rate. In arriving at this decision, we can only wonder if fair hearing as provided by virtue of Section 36 CFRN 1999 was granted to the representatives of the okada union. The sections provides that in the determination of the whole right and obligation of any person, such persons should be entitled to fair hearing. As Jean J. Rousseau once stated; “Just as an architect who puts up a good building, first surveys and test the ground to see if it can bear the weight, so the wise law giver begins not by laying down good laws in themselves but by finding out whether the people whom the laws are intended are able to support them.” Certainly, this proposition is utopian to the Nigerian society. Some persons would want to argue that the state governor in arriving at his decision acted administratively, but we should bear in mind that when a public body acts administratively, he is expected to act reasonably to reach a decision. To the government, it is a right step to call the shots of crime, but this is rapidly the beginning of an explosive incursion or volley of crime in the state.
                 It has also been bruited too that the ban was also for security reasons owing to the alleged infiltration of the dreaded Islamic sect “Boko Haram” into the state. Is there anything reasonable in what the state governor has done? The immense price of hardship and penury amongst the people of the state will raise the ante if the governor’s meteoric and rash decision is not checked. John Locke had aptly declared “Salus populi Suprema lex” which means “Let the welfare of the people be the supreme law.” Oddly, the welfare of the people means no sausage than just lip service to the government. In Nigeria where majority of the populace grapple to live on bread line, okada riding is seen as a lucrative job. The governor’s rash decisions is an indirect guideline to increase the membership and make rookies of the Edo state branch of THE JOBLESS ONES SOCIETY OF NIGERIA (JOS) and the RESERVED ARMY OF THE UNEMPLOYED (R.A.U).
                     It is remarkably ironic that the state governor who instigated this embargo was the same person who said “where the poverty of the people of the state becomes so high and unassuming, it then becomes a security threat to the riches of the few.” The government gave a few days’ notice before the ban of the use of motorcycles, but it would not have been out of place if say three or six months’ notice was given to that effect. THE LEGAL WATCHMEN is saying that the government may have other axes to grind as regards the ban of motorcycle operators but revealing provisions and pro-active measures should be put in place to cushion the effect on the commercial motorcyclist.
                 The Edo state government cannot be blamed for its action. Certainly, they don’t know how the motorcycle has eased our heavy loads. Those in the corridors of power drive in exotic cars when they are not flying in exquisite jets, and even when they do; they don’t get snarled up in traffic. The bleak impact of this ban is that a journey of twenty minutes on a motorcycle would now take hours to hot foot it. People now have to wake up as early as 4am to start preparation for work so as not to be derelict in their duty.
                 The welfare of the people should be of paramount interest to any government. As Section 16 (1) (b) CRFN 1999 enunciates that “the state shall control the nation’s economy in such manner as to secure the maximum welfare, freedom and happiness of every citizen on the basis of social justice and equality of status and opportunity.” It is apparent that the actions of some state governors should be checked. They should be made to understand that Section 14 (2) (b) CFRN 1999 provides that “the security and welfare of the people shall be the primary purpose of government.”

                  The governor of Edo state must take into cognisance that for every decision taken is for a definitive purpose that will occasion a positive change or instigate negativity. The governor should note the dictum of Gen. Ibrahim Babangida that “History may forgive you for not making decisions but will certainly not forgive you for making a wrong decision that shall end the destiny and future of my people.” 

Tuesday, 2 July 2013

SMILING: A NEBULIZER


                  SMILING: A NEBULIZER
                Seeing an asthmatic patient go haywire, gasping for air, trying to close up the big divide between life and death, grass-cutting his way out of this newly found catch-22 to no avail, until a golden penny is dropped into the slot of this malady, he/she dances on the pages of wriggling. What a shame that it is only a small nebulizer that will grind to a halt this series of unadventurous escapades. So too is the spirit of smiling.
Smiling is the only medicine that does not have a bitter taste, is less expensive, needs no prescription and is more effective. Sadly however, that people have become immune to this ‘contaminant’. I met a young man one day and I told him to his face; “….I cannot successfully walk with you because you don’t smile …..” if you are that cookie of persons that frowns all the time, as the idiomatic expression couches it ‘as rosy as the American pie’, I think it is high time you lend colour from the Americans. Your cosmetic outlook is not complete without wearing a smile. Before you leave your dressing room, look at the mirror properly to see that that underrated part of dressing ethics is adjusted.
Squeezing your face is a pictorial portrait of a sicklier or a dead man. The more you squeeze the more wrinkles crinkles into your face. If you can smile, you can laugh. Even the Holy Writ attests to my clam that even God smiles; “He that sitteth in the heavens shall laugh…’’ Psalm 2 vs 4.  If God the creator can smile, how much more we his creatures. Smiling is a principal factor in everything because it adds to your face value. If you don’t smile you are devalued, depreciative and out-of-date.
Smiling is affective. It is a throw from a take-off spot that elevates to another which results in a hit back. Witches and wizards in their covens laugh upon a successful diabolical inroad of plans. Even animals like hyenas laugh. Some people claim that simians [apes, monkeys etc.] are ugly animals but it is even more surprising that they laugh better and free themselves from all burdens within their fauna than some human beings who claim to be rational beings. Every person you see may be fighting a hard battle, that notwithstanding, will frowning and anguishing over your agony remedy your predicaments? If yes, then frown your way to a bottomless “Frowning land” and acclimatize yourself with the citizens of “frowners”. What will it actually take away from you if you submerge your problems upon rumination in the pools of smile? In spite of you being angry, sad, downcast, heavy et cetera, you can always resort to the government class of “smilo-cracy” where people are tutelaged on the government of smiling; which is anchored on the motto:
THE SMILING CLASS IS TOO FEW WE NEED MORE BALLOTS
One who is intransigent to change, should in his own best interest inject himself with nitric-oxide, a technical term for laughing gas. If you meet a person diseased with the melancholic spirit of long hauling his/her face, steer clear so that you don’t get contaminated. It is no doubt an incurable disease that medical researchers and personnel are still on an unadventurous discovery for a cure.
The reason why you can see some old men and women still looking spright is not far-fetched. It is not because they may be nutritionally inclined, but they also understand the power of smiling. One may ask where the wrinkles are. Their wrinkles have moved from their faces and have been set poles away into their minds which makes them wise in dispensing advice, hence the astute saying “Age is sage”.
The place of smiling cannot be over-flogged as the Faculty of Law is not an exception to this disquisition. Prior to their ascendency to a political office, aspirants vying for a position go the extra length to warm the cockles of your heart. They become celebrities as they extravagantly shake the hands of everybody they come across. Most of them smile to the extent that their mouths are almost torn off, just to secure their votes. Upon ruling the roost, it becomes as different as chalk and cheese as politicians’ breeze pass fellow LAWSANS that even a handshake is a “sin”. What an electoral travesty!  And a betrayal of the gods of smile.
I will pellucidly say at this juncture that to smile is not a thought but a habit that will in the long run determine your habitat.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                               






Saturday, 29 June 2013

BROKEN EGGS, BUT NO OMELETTES: THE “IMPRESSIVE” PERFORMANCE OF THE SUPER EAGLES AT THE FIFA CONFEDERATIONS CUP.


The recent outing of the incontrovertible “Super Chickens” at the ongoing FIFA Confederations Cup leaves no room for doubt as to their unparalleled and unprecedented quality. The Nigerian team which had at the onstage brimmed with unquenchable valour made it known to us that anything short of the trophy was a failure. Happily, they were able to display their unequalled prowess against the Tahitian side that was no doubt made up of a golden selection of well experienced mechanics, welders, farmers, and bus conductors who have spent a great deal of their lifetime on the football pitch.
            Not that the Super Chickens should be blamed anyway. Their political counterparts back at home induce us into believing during their campaigns that anything short of a utopian state is a failure. But once they find themselves within the corridors of power, they would gladly build hospitals, roads, bridges, and unabashedly create jobs on the pages of newspapers and T.V screens. Hard as it seems, the Super Chickens (sorry, Eagles) gave us a very good show. They proved their mettle by losing out when it mattered most after a well displayed beautiful nonsense. However, we do know that when eggs are broken and omelettes cannot be made from them, such eggs are as good as stones.
            Now, it seems that a contest to outshine the Super Eagles and its political counterparts has been initiated by the Osagu Innocent- led LAWSAN government. The new government seems to be very attentive to the pressing needs of LAWSANs. It is no doubt in exercise of this unique and exceptional insight that the new executives deem it of paramount and utmost importance that a visit to MacCarthy beach is what law students need just a few weeks to the second semester examinations. It has always been my view that most government officials are indeed highly sensitive and perceptive. I cannot but hail the oriental wisdom and offer my ‘sincere’ congratulations to the LAWSA executives for their Solomonic wisdom. As the Igbos would say, “The Ocean eats only the legs it sees.” MacCarthy beach, as I was told, takes at least one person when disturbed. So I wonder whose legs MacCarthy beach wants to eat this time around.
            Before we are accused of being spoilsports, I am not unconvinced that a visit to the Benin High Court or the Court of Appeal would not prove worthless. I was informed by Secondary School students that the Edo State House of Assembly has a large gallery for visitors. I know that the National Assembly is out of the question, let alone the Supreme Court. All these places would greatly improve our training as lawyers, not some place where the crazy ones amongst us cannot wait to display their appalling nudity.
            I am sure that going by the calibre of people who represent us in the LAWSA parliament and also in the exco can do exceedingly greater than this. Their innovative and assiduous leadership should be channelled in the right direction so as to catapult LAWSA into higher horizons, for ‘direction is more important than speed.’                                              
  Make una no fall our hand oooo!               

Tuesday, 25 June 2013

PREDATORS

From the POETIC WING of the LEGAL WATCHMEN:

                     PREDATORS

In our ever vulnerable strength – or blindness
They have always denuded our meekness
Even when we seem to summon courage
To wilt their constant peddling’s of outrage
We turn out losing much blood
Than a murdered mosquito does
Just to lay their filthy claws on our petrodollars
They wouldn’t mind wringing our collars


Riddling us with diseases that have no cure’
Always impinging us with the rickety effect of yaws
They pollute our streams of gallant wills
You always see them in the dark metallic wheels
O creator! You know that the birds were living
Even before the udara stopped producing
God! Our lowered voices in sequence
Will forever recede in suffocating silence
As they leave their legacies of destruction
Marring the serenity of our confusion.

                         ARIKOR COLLINS.


Friday, 21 June 2013

WAR AGAINST PORNOGRAPHY


A psychological war is currently brewing in Nigeria. This is the serious decade-old battle between serious literature and pornography. The contemporaneous Nigerian society has been so bastardized by the influx of Western culture that we seem to be losing our foothold on our sense of values. Many Nigerians have assimilated to a significant degree, a multitudinous memorabilia of the Western culture that it would not be surprising to discover that many Nigerian youths dream Western dreams.
Pornography is that aspect of literature that is designed to entice the consumer sexually. It comes in diverse forms, including writings, recordings, still pictures, motion pictures, Facebook statuses and profile pictures, Blackberry Messenger display pictures, and Skype I.m’s. It is very sad to note however that pornography in its different forms is gaining the upper hand in this colossal battle.
It is no doubt intriguing at the rate at which the Nigerian public, especially the social networking sites, is being flooded by an influx of pornographic materials in its different forms these days. One can hardly visit a social networking site without being assaulted by a superfluous and redundant display of the mammary glands, and pictures of nude women in highly beguiling postures. These apart, the most annoying fact is that many Nigerian youths, most especially the females have taken to engage in an empirical experiment. Most indolent Nigerian youths unabashedly portray these animalistic attitudes in their vulgar mode of dressing and uncouth behaviour. And many of them are not ashamed to give Section 39(1) CFRN 1999 as the ratio for this primitive behaviour.
In view of this obnoxious cankerworm that is eating deep into the recess of the Nigerian public, can it then be said that the framers of our constitution did not deem it worthwhile in balancing the freedom of expression as guaranteed in Section 39(1) CFRN with adequate checks on its abuse as other countries have done? The answer is very glaring. The Criminal Code which is an act of parliament that is in conformity with the totality of the constitution makes express provisions relating to this demoralising phenomenon. Section 233 of the Criminal Code Act under paragraphs A-F expressly prohibits any obscene article or publication. Subsection (B) went to great lengths to define “article” as used in this context to include: anything capable of being or likely to be looked at and read or looked at or read, and includes any film or record of a picture or pictures, and any sound records.  Thus, going by the extensive definition of the Criminal Code Act, anybody who posts any picture on Facebook, Blackberry Messenger, Twitter, Skype, or any other social networking site which fulfils the intention listed in Section 233(B) and which also by virtue of Section 233(C)(1), is intended to deprave and corrupt persons who are likely, having regard to all relevant circumstances, to read, see or hear the matter contained or embodied in it; such a person is by virtue of Section 233(D)(1), guilty of an offence punishable on conviction by a fine not exceeding four hundred naira or by imprisonment for a term not exceeding three years or by both.
                The English court of appeal the case of  Shaw v DPP (1961)2 All ER 446, held that the courts have a residual power to enforce the fundamental purpose of the law which is to keep law and order, and that there is an offence known as  conspiracy to corrupt public morals. This judgement was upheld by the English Court of Appeal in DPP v Whyte (1972) AC 849, where it held that the court is duty bound to conserve safety and order, as well as the moral welfare of the state.
                Thus, going by the astute provisions of the Criminal Code and the stand of the court on the issue, there is no doubt that many a Uniben student would spend at least half of his/her academic calendar anguishing in gaol due to the lackadaisical attitude of the Nigerian youth towards the issue.
I would therefore like to sound a timeous note of warning to anyone who is guilty of this unwholesome attitude to beware, for a day of reckoning is coming when we will be to account for our deeds and misdeeds on this planet.


Tuesday, 18 June 2013

SUCH A MYSTERY


Death!!! Such a mystery to bear
Thy wings one cannot but fear
When thou takes’t thy lofty flight
One seems to wonder at the height
Leaving behind trails of pain and grief
That nothing else can be a relief
Will not ignore you in public.

Oh! What can be worst than death?
When covered by hallow dirt
That we should rise
His grace to praise
To behold our everlasting prize
Only to be denied the gains
With clothes torn and ragged
To doom we be dragged

Death! Death!! Death!!!
Such a mystery you are in the ring
That even he the king
In humility he bows to sorrow
With a view of life so shallow
In periods of pains and distress
My soul has often found to stress
BE NOT AFRAID OF WHAT IS TO COME


                                                                                                                        KHOSY.E.

MIND HOW YOU PRAISE THE AUTHORITIES WITH ‘WINGS’

It still baffles me when I see and hear the slogan ‘the police is your friend’. The big questions that have lingered on in my mind are; Are they really our friends? Do they really care about our welfare? Do they fight for our rights and ensure peace and order in our society? Or are they mercenaries of chaos? Until recently, I found the answers to these questions.                                                                                                                This is the story of a final year student; IBRAHIM MOMODU, twenty-two(22)years of age, and a student of the University of Benin from the department of Science Lab Technology, who murdered by the police at the Ogida barrack on the 27th of May 2013. Murdered on what grounds? It was alleged that he was a robber prowling the vicinity on a motorcycle and was shot on the leg by a Divisional Police Officer (D.P.O) because he tried to refuse a lawful arrest. I wonder why a gun shot on the leg would suddenly appear on the chest because I never imagine our police force to be part of a magic circus. Here arises another question hanging on the pendulum of the societal clock. Who shot the boy in the chest that led to his untimely demise? I thought this denial happens only in cartoons and movies. I begin to wonder about the functions of the police, whether it is to take life or preserve life.
The point that really makes me smell a rat in the bag, is the quick burial of the boy without notifying his family. The newly found attitudes of the Nigerian police makes me go berserk, and have kittens. John Bancroft, the  founder of the police force in the 1930’s never intended professional misconduct, neither does the Police Act stipulate that a police must kill a person upon having a screw loose in the head or irated by the actions of the citizens. I wonder what a human could have done to warrant such sore and ignominious treatment. This is really not the first time that the police have portrayed this ludicrous disposition to the Nigerian public and the International community at large. The very fact that Section 24(e) CFRN 199 provides that “It shall be the duty of every citizen to render assistance to appropriate and lawful agencies in the maintenance of law and order”, will continue to be a constitutional dead-letter as a result of the disposition of the police to Nigerians.
What then is the position of the law in relation to this societal issue? Section 306 of the Criminal Code Act provides that “It is unlawful to kill any person unless such killing is authorised or justified or excused by law.” Can it be said, beyond the preponderance of all vagaries of doubt, that the act of the policewoman shooting a male student on his chest is justifiable or excusable by law?  Section 315 of the Criminal Code Act provides that “Any person who unlawfully kills another is guilty of an offence which is called murder or manslaughter according to the circumstances of the case.”
Some pundits may say it is not an unlawful killing since they are authorised and institutionalised, boldly executing functions within their exclusive domain as their duties require. This would amount to be a subjective argument. If the deceased Momodu was with a gun, it could then have been said that they shot him in self-defence in the execution of their duties. But this was not the case. The police shot him on the chest when he was without a weapon. Can it then be said that Momodu constituted, or had reason to constitute a reasonable modicum of threat to the existence and well-being of the policewoman who shot him? The policewoman’s action is a clear usurpation judicial function and an utter deprivation of Momodu’s fundamental right to life. As regards the deprivation of his fundamental rights, Section 33(1) CFRN 1999 expressly provides that “every person has a right to life…” as regards the usurpation of judicial functions, it provides in that same subsection that “…no one should be deprived intentionally of his life, save in the execution of the sentence of a criminal offence of which he has been found guilty of in Nigeria.” This therefore means that only the court has the imprimatur to declare a judicial fiat of death sentence on any person charged with a criminal offence.
In fact, it can even be said that the defaulting policewoman had no intention to arrest, for if she actually had an intention to arrest, she would had shot him on the leg. It has been established that it is only the court that has the judicial power to pronounce death sentence or order the execution of a criminal. It means that any other institutionalised or executory body e.g. the Police Force, the EFCC, et cetera, in the exercise of their duty cannot kill or snuff out the life of any citizen except in the case of defence. It therefore means that the policewoman’s action was unlawful and Section 319(1) of the Criminal Code Act provides that “…anyone who commits the offence of murder shall be sentenced to death.”
The police is meant to be the centre of the nation’s control tower concerning security. They do not reflect the National ethics of discipline, integrity, et cetera as contained in Section 23 of the Constitution of the Federal Republic of Nigeria, 1999. They rather act in manners that are unscrupulous, always on their marks to take bribes every now and then, and in n a hurry to oppress people who stand against it, they act in tardy manners, tentative towards their duty but up and doing to get involved in purely civil matters because of the meagre amount or chicken feed that would swell their pockets; very truculent and have left us with no legacy. This will be a food for thought to all policemen, both constables and inspector-Generals. If you take bribe, you sell your integrity. It is the cheapest and the least expensive route to a policeman’s heart. The masses see it as a weakness on the part of the police, but the latter see it as their strength to walk over the masses.
Oh! What an ignorance! A split hair discrepancy. Policemen may ignore their ignorance, but their ignorance will never ignore them in public.
It is therefore time for the police to hold their moral view tenaciously and be ardent about maintaining peace and order instead of being instruments of chaos. It was once said by a renowned writer that “true nobility is not being superior to others but being superior to who you were.” For to be loyal to your superior is a duty, to your equals is nobility, but to your inferiors is humility. It is high time we clean the force of all “criminals”, who parade themselves as ‘catchminals’ to wake them up from their illusory slumber and stop them from being myopic to the erroneous fact that the Police Force is a place to make daily gains. It has also been said that “if you cannot stand the heat, then get out of the kitchen.” It is also time for the ‘dutiful’, shylock; and incompetent ones to leave while the competent ones who are ready to serve be brought in.
The Nigerian Police force constitutes a gathering of highly impetuous, lugubriously ludicrous, and unscrupulous ‘servants’, and until the force is swept, brushed, cleaned and wiped, we cannot have a better service.





Monday, 17 June 2013

DEMONS AMONGST LAW STUDENTS: ‘BONING’ AND ‘FORMING’ AMONGST CLASSMATES

Does it really make sense for a 200level student to pass his course mate without even a glance or greeting passing between them? Is it really becoming of social animals that have been placed together by nature in the same classroom for the next five years to learn together without even knowing their names? Indeed I was baffled when I accosted one of my course mate and challenged her that we have been together in the same classroom for close to two years and I didn’t even know her name. The excuse that she gave before she finally told me her name got me really thinking. She told me that we are so many in the class that it is not possible for everyone to know each other.
             Can it then be said, beyond all reasonable vestiges of doubt, that we are in such a multitudinous number that this is not achievable? A proper perusal of the issue at hand will reveal that the major reason why most Law students don’t talk to themselves is that they have a misguided sense of pride. Most law students have a capitalistic-cum-bourgeoisie mentality. They believe that the fact that they come from a well-to-do background gives them an air of superiority over and above their course mates. Personally speaking, this mentality is one that is demonic-guided and not of God. Remember in the words of Martin Luther King Jnr., “If we don’t live together as brothers, then we will die together as fools.” The fact that one is from a rich background does not give him or her the imprimatur to be a snub all in the name of forming. One cannot make it to the top of the ladder without the help of friends for friends are people who oil the engines of one’s life.
            Another unfortunate mentality which is peculiar to many a law student is the opprobrious habit of using his knowledge of law to oppress and intimidate others. A close friend of mine in a futile attempt to escape his contractual liability unsuccessfully tried to rely on some technical jargons which could not avail him. Most law students are in the habit of using the knowledge which they have not even fully acquired to the detriment of others. As Socrates goldenly puts it; “True knowledge or wisdom is in accepting your ignorance.” The fact that one is studying law does not give him or her an extended air of superiority over one who is studying Fish Farming. I can categorically state at this juncture, without the fear of equivocation that there are many people studying Linguistics and the Languages who are intellectually and academically more mature than some law students.

            I hope I have succeeded in my God given assignment of flogging out the evil spirits of ‘forming’ and the demons of ‘boning’ which seems to have invaded the souls of many a law student. If anybody who is guilty of this unbecoming attitude and is not ready to change in the nearest future, then I would suggest to CLASFON to organise a special vigil in which they would invite renowned men of God who will come to do a special deliverance service to rid our faculty of these demonic elements. For the best room is the room for improvement. Change in itself is unchanging.

Sunday, 16 June 2013

THE COURTROOM- A POEM

The Bar
The Bench
The accused
The air pregnant with tension.

Learned men in wigs
Raising salient and pertinent issues
Invoking general rules and their exceptions
Invoking the provisions of statutes and judicially affirming them.

Suspects, accused, Plaintiffs a’ Defendants
Brought to humility by the court
Regardless of their societal standings
Following the proceedings of the court with pretentious air of interest.

The witnesses, sworn to tell the sooth and sod off
Bound by the provisions of the Evidence Act and the ropes of the court
In leaps and bounds
Find thyself in a fit ‘cause o’ the dreading cross-examination.


The learned men in wigs
Taking up the gauntlet
Hammering on the finer points of law
Applying the sword to the facts at hand.

The custodian of justice
Like a pendulum swings hither thither to every word said
Interrupting courses of argument when off tangent
With a learned air of learnedness.

O! What a great hush that befalleth the court
The harbinger of justice unentangles his windpipe
Rejects repulsive argument and concedes to conscientious conclusions
With a vengeance on a free ride to judgment.

O! What a spectacle it is to behold
Better even to be in the throes of wigs
And best it seems to bestow judgment

What a promise the profession holds for all.

LAW- A POEM

What is law if one may ask?
Is it an art or act to task?
Either way one cannot be wrong.
In the field of humanities it is rung.

To some, positivist they call them
Law is a command upon which sanctions stems
From a political superior
To a political inferior.

To others it is a notion of fairness
Which concerns itself with righteousness.
Upon equity it is based
On it can justice be raised.

Whichever view you think is right
Endeavour always to keep in sight
And in our memories should we store
That the world is nothing without law.


                                                                                                                                                                  Oluwanonso.

THE SUN ON THE RUBBLES: A HUGE QUESTION MARK ON SECTION 6(6)(c) OF THE CONSTITUTION OF THE FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA.

Imagine a nation where the legislature, executive and judiciary conforms to the provisions of the constitution; a Federal Republic in which the hallowed principles of democracy and social justice is practised; where sovereignty indeed belongs to the people; where democracy as it should be is practised, religious tolerance, discipline at all levels, national integration, zero tolerance for corruption, and a balanced economy where resources are pigeonholed to apposite bodies through positive governmental policies is made effective. A nation founded on the ideals of freedom, equality and justice. A nation where citizens can hold the government accountable to them. A nation where the national ethics are observed. A nation where her vision 2020/20 mandate will be chalked up. This nation is not farfetched as true to the words of Henry Thoreau that “in the next 20 years to come, you will be more disappointed for the things you did not achieve than the ones you achieved. So catch the wind! Set sail! Dream! Explore! Discover!”
These beautiful epithets that makes a nation has taken a long walk into the desert. Is this possible? Or are these spains built in the air? Baffling questions are many, convincing answers are pending.
In the 18th century, a little girl, Joan of Arc filliped nationalistic feelings in France. That alone galvanised the French citizens from the giant pincer of the Englishmen. A choice made by one person caused a positive vicissitude in that country. There are many keys that hold Nigeria into a bunch, but just one key will swing Nigeria on the hinges of this Ivory tower. Yes this nation is possible. “For impossibility is found only in the dictionary of fools” a la Napoleon Hill.

A careful and detailed perusal of Chapter II of the Constitution of the Federal Republic of Nigeria which entails the Fundamental Principles of State Policy has found barren soil in the Federal Republic of Nigeria. Section 13 of the said Chapter II provides that: “It shall be the duty and responsibility of all organs of government, and of all authorities and persons, exercising legislative, executive or judicial powers, to conform to, observe and apply the provisions of this chapter of the constitution.” However, by virtue of Section 6(6)(c), “The judicial powers vested in accordance with the foregoing provisions of this section, shall not, except as otherwise provided by this constitution, extend to any issue or question as to whether any act or omission by any authority or person or as to whether any law or any judicial decision is in conformity with the Fundamental Objectives and Directive Principles of State Policy set out in chapter II of this constitution.” This provision is ridiculously opprobrious and far-fetched as a result of the fact that Item 60(a) of the Exclusive List of the same constitution provides that “The establishment and regulation of authorities for the Federation or any part thereof- to promote and enforce the observance of the Fundamental Objectives and Directive Principles contained in this constitution.” The combined reading of Section 6(6)(c) and Item 60(a) impedes the effective actualization of Section 13. Is it not contradictory for the court by virtue of Section 6(6)(c) to refuse to entertain any matter specified in Chapter II, and at the same time be compelled to promote and enforce the observance of the matters contained in this same chapter II by virtue of Item 60(a) of the Exclusive List? This then means that the courts are placing imprimatur on the Exclusive List which is a Federal instrument over and above the Fundamental Objectives and Directive Principles of State Policy. This burnt offering has become a reiterated incantation and also an abused immunity which has rendered political firmament superior to the rigours of the law. For any breach of Chapter II, they chant their ‘Political Anthem’- Section 6(6)(c) . This brings about a barrage of questions…

CAF UNDER-17 NATIONS CUP FINAL AND THE LESSONS TO BE LEARNT.

Why can’t politicians be like footballers? Why can’t all the contestants to an elective post line themselves up before the election starts and shake one another? Why don’t they play according to the rules of the game and help their opponents back to their feet when down? And most importantly, at the end of the election, why can they not congratulate the winning party even though they have lost?
All these are utopian ideals only and cannot suo motu be achieved in contemporary Nigeria. Indeed I was amazed at the behaviour of the Nigerian under-17 players when they lost out to Ivory Coast in the ghastly penalty shoot-out of the CAF Under-17 Nations Cup finals. Most of the Nigerian players immediately started shedding tears at their grievous misfortune and indeed, a number of them had to be dragged out of the pitch by the coaching team. I was also astounded by the coaches when they took it upon themselves to console the players, reminding them that this was just the instigation of their nascent and burgeoning career.True to the words of Martin Luther ‘we must live together as brothers or die together as fools’
I was also flabbergasted when I learnt that the players had swapped their shorts with the victorious Cote d’Ivorians. I was immediately struck by the symbolism of this act and its implications. It symbolised friendship and support for the Ivorian team as the best in contemporary Africa. I could not but contrast this with the events which immediately follow-up any election in Nigeria. In Nigeria, on the election date, no two opposing politician must see eye-eye before the election. This would spark off instantaneous trouble and riots.I mean this would stir up the hornet’s nest.Two contending politicians must never vote in the same polling centre. Rather, each contestant must go to his capital, where he feels he has the strongest support to cast his vote. If by any slight mistake, two contending politicians come athwart each other on the polling day, nothing more than a glance is expected to pass between them. This is in stark contrast with the behaviour of football players on the pitch.
When the election results are released, is there any law, statutory or judicial, that prohibits and restrain candidates from shaking hands? Is there any judicial decision to the effect that the court frowns upon a losing candidate congratulating his victorious opponent? Why can’t the party chairmen throw a party to congratulate the winning party? Is it even a taboo for a candidate to cry openly when he discovers that he has lost the election? The brave Nigerian players did not hesitate to cry after the match, and there is no doubt that the tears contributed to their catharsis. If politicians cry after hearing the results of an election? The tears would help to purge them of any ill feeling towards their opponent.
As to the symbolic act of exchange of jerseys, I wonder if there is any provision in the Electoral Act, express or implied, to the effect that exchange of party memorabilia is an offence.
Why am I stating all these observations? In a few weeks from today, the faculty of law would be having her own in-house elections. It is expected that the players in this election play according to the ropes of the game. But what happens when these rules are not effective, or worse still, there are no rules? It is time for us Nigerians to awaken from a dogmatic slumber and be alert to the shenanigans of dubious politicians.

Politicians come with the mind-set that they have guided missiles but most times the reverse is the always the case. Let us vote with our foot when ‘carroted’ by any politician. For no man can lead the people without their consent. The voice of the people cannot be undermined and their vote is the microphone of the Government. So let us choose leaders that have developmental calculus and not those with flowery words to fill empty stomachs. Rather, leaders who will lead the way, show the way and go the way. For indeed the ballot is the rightful successor of the bullet. 

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