TELEMUNDO : A WOMAN'S CHAMPION'S LEAGUE

           For decades, maybe even centuries, men during football season have dominated the television and neglected their wives and girlfriends’ pleas for attention and conversation in order to prevent them from missing Messi’s free kick, women everywhere have given up and accepted defeat at the hands of Super Sport……or so we thought.

        Now while the men and boyfriends of the world were busy jumping and squealing while watching Manchester United and Arsenal school each other, the Global Association of Wives and Girlfriends was scheming and brainstorming ways to regain control of the television at all hours, the African branch argued that they were already in charge of concoction of meals and nominated the American branch for the task, the American women argued vehemently that they were already in charge of the production and distribution of weaves and shoes and so they could not take on another project. After much argument and delegation of responsibility, it was finally agreed that the Mexican branch who had remained jobless from the inception of the organization should take on the responsibility of coming up with a way for the women to repay their men for their ninety minutes of negligence and regain control of the remote at the same time.

     The Mexican women tried various things ranging from ensuring that the times for beauty pageant clashed with the times of various matches to ensuring that matches were played on weekdays so working men would be discouraged from watching but nothing seemed to work. Just when the Mexican women were about to call an emergency meeting and declare that they had given up, they decided that they might not be able to stop football but they could come up with feminine equivalent to the evil that stole their men’s attention for all of 90 minutes! Thus Telemundo was born.

      Now, for those of us who are not familiar with this concept, let me give you a short lesson on the subject. Telemundo is a DSTV channel on 118 which only shows Mexican or South-American soaps with English voice-overs, mainly on subjects of love, jealousy, envy and passion. The actors and actresses are characteristically beautiful. Telemundo is relatively a new channel and started off on AIT and other TV stations which showed Mexican soaps for one hour every day. There are some popular ones which you may heard of or even watched such as ‘When you are mine’ , ‘Second Chance’ etc And for men, if you have been wandering what keeps your wife or girlfriend awake till eleven watching TV every weekday, it’s probably a Mexican soap. It’s worthy to note that since these Mexican soaps are shown for only one hour every day, they span over four months before they are concluded.

          Now back to the women’s scheme, The plan of the Mexican women became such a great success that it was given its own channel which shows at least five consecutive telenovelas each showing for fifty minutes daily (without adverts). The GAWG was so happy at the invention of the Mexican branch and put it to use immediately. Instantly, they stopped complaining of the men’s football and tables turned. The men were the ones complaining that women no longer had their time because they were busy watching Telemundo and admiring the beautiful actors carefully handpicked for such a purpose.

    Telemundo has now come to ensure that women no longer have the time to try to distract their husbands and boyfriends from football. This story just goes to show you the power of a determined woman or in this case, all the determined women in the world. We are watching to see what the International Association of Husbands and Boyfriends will do about this, until then please who knows what’s wrong with Pilar? lol